Wednesday, February 4, 2009

Note to Idiots

I figured I would do a nice follow up from my last Note to Idiot by furnishing you with the link to the news story from the local paper. It includes the majority of the story along with his wonderful booking photo. We're hoping that catch gets my cop Officer of the Month for January too!

On to this week's note:

Dear Hallmark,

Please fire your creative team. I have seen nothing but the same jokes rehashed in all of your greeting cards. NEWSFLASH: The card that is glued together so it won't open is no longer funny!

And hmmm.... I wonder what stuffed animal you will bombard us with this year for Valentine's Day? Will it be two frogs kissing or maybe an inappropriately vibrating lion? I hope you know that this crap usually just ends up in the trash or in a donation bin. Or if the relationship goes sour, it may just end up in flames...

Please try something else.

Note to Self:
No seriously - a vibrating lion. I know, right?


Rachel said...

Oh I so agree with that dumb card...really is that funny?

Maki said...

I say fire current employees and hire MJ! What do you think?

teeni said...

LOL - Great update shot on the note to idiot! And yes, those stuck-closed cards really are overdone.

Franco said...

I agree with maki, hire MJ, LOL.

kweenmama said...

Ditto on Hallmark hiring MJ!

I wasn't aware there was a vibrating lion. Kinda wish I still didn't know...

Danielle said...

I watched that clip on the Hallmark site, and in addition to being totally baffled about why ANYONE would give this gift, I got to watch my dog freak out at the sounds it made!

pure evyl said...

Somehow I knew that guy would have a goatie.

KarenElizabeth said...

I'm really disturbed by the vibrating lion.

SarahM said...

I think the vibrating lion, is effin fantastic!
i missed you!

Matt said...

I wish Hallmark would hire me as a writer.

I could totally write greeting cards all day.

MJ said...

Rachel - No. No it's not.

Maki - Sounds good to me. As long as it pays, I'm there!

Teeni - Yep. He looks like a real winner, eh? I always have the urge to tear one of those cards open when I see one. Just be like ooops when the card security comes to take me away - "I thought it was just stuck together!!"

Franco - :)

Kweenmama - Seriously. Like really? Why does it vibrate? Is that supposed to be purring? IN which case, do lions purr?

Danielle - LOL. Hmmm... i will have to try that on Panther.

PE - LOL. Figures, right?

Karen - No kidding.

Sarah - Well, hint to your honey that you want one. Crazy, where have you been??

Matt - No kidding. I did a post way back when on some new Hallmark cards that should be made...