Thursday, October 23, 2008

Note to Idiots

Dear micro-managing admin at work,

Thank you so much for that lovely slip attached to my pay stub this week. It's nice to know that I "was late 3 out of 5 days last week for a total of 4 minutes."

Okay, let's go over that again.

I was late 3 out of 5 days last week for a total of FOUR EFFING MINUTES, and you lovingly placed this message on the outside of my pay stub envelope where I could find it along with a note that I needed to adjust my schedule so I would not be late and that a copy of this slip was being placed in my permanent file.

*SIGH* Okay. Let's do some simple math, shall we?

You guys pay me jack, but in those four minutes you saved paying me about $0.90. Four minutes, by the way, I would have spent doing nothing anyway. The piece of paper you printed it on cost you probably around $0.10 to print. That leaves an $0.80 difference for you. Still with me?

Okay, then you take up a woman in HR's valuable time to print this, handwrite in the numbers, and then stuff it into my payroll envelope. I happen to know this person makes more than me, and we'll assume it takes her about 1 minute to print, 1 minute to handwrite the thing, and another 1 minute to find my envelope and stick it in there. Even if we're assuming she only makes slightly more than I do, you still come out in the negative on this one.... OVER FOUR FREAKING MINUTES.

Take a business class. Or better yet, a math class.

Seriously?
MJ

Note to Self: I NEED A NEW JOB.

16 comments:

Maki said...

I hate those anal bosses who count every single/micro second!!!

Yes, tardiness is not good, but 4 minutes total last week is not bad at all. I mean, really..

MilesPerHour said...

I feel ya! Lucky for me my supervisor doesn't micro-manage me however working for the government and these tough times makes it scary. So I fully expect that scenarios like you describe are about to hapen more and more.

Franco said...

four minutes in total, omfgm, seriously, hat damaged could you casue in 4 minutes, you boss does seem anal.
sorry :( bossses are a pain in the rear.

Sarah - LeoHubby said...

Wow -just wow...ya know - I would going to stand in someone's doorway for 4 extra mins, and when asked what you were doing - I would say - Making up my time I missed - this is my lunch hour - Oh wait, Lunch 56 mins.....

kpdwife said...

what happened to coming in early and hitting them up for some OT pay? LOL

I used to be late constantly....then I changed my "hours" to 7:45 AM instead of 8. Then if I'm running late, I should still here on time in their mind..

Dorkys R. said...

Four minutes?!? Dear Lord...I got one here who strolls in an hour late (at least!) everyday so I'm looking pretty good if I roll in five minutes late.

Plus, our end times are a big, fat question mark and we don't get OT. So if I'm ever late they can just take it from that!

~alison said...

Unbelievable! That is soooo freakin' ridiculous. Does your boss even miss you those FOUR MINUTES?? Someone needs a life!

Rachel said...

Gotta love working for someone else....sucks!

Sornie said...

When you quit that job, and let's hope it's soon, be sure to burn every damn bridge on the way out because a place like that isn't worth even being respectable towards.

kweenmama said...

You definitely need a new job.

pure evyl said...

I sneak in the back way. Only the tower guards know when I show up.

The Incredible Woody said...

That's why I love working at home. No one knows when (or if) I get started. And I can work in my PJs if I choose!!

MJ said...

To all - These people wouldn't even know I was late if I didn't have to clock in. Oh, and I do in fact make up this time. I usually still clock quite a bit of overtime pay because of a short lunch and long afternoon hours.

teeni said...

Then they wonder why they are losing money. Cracks me up.

DEL said...

So you're clocking in an average of 40ish seconds late every morning and they felt the need to point that out?!? Unbelievable.

K Trainor said...

So...how many times have you punched in four minutes early? Stayed four minutes past quitting time? Somebody needs to remove that pole from his or her kiester before the nether region gets inflamed.