Sunday, August 25, 2013

Customer Service

Dear Customer,

We haven't met, although you have accosted my management staff several times. From what I understand, you have tried to return some items you felt the need to hold onto for several months despite our 60 day return policy.

When my staff tried to accommodate you with an exchange or store credit at current value, you were having none of it. So, per usual, we gave you the customer service number, and you got hold of some poor guy there who you recounted your sad story too. He told you the policy and what we could offer, which seemed to appease you. What you did not tell him was that we did, in fact, also offer you what we could per policy. Pants. On. Fire.

He told you to come back in, called my manager and told her the sad story too. Fortunately for me, my manager understands that anyone who calls customer service on my store is probably just a raving bitch or a compulsive liar. You are both, ma'am.

You came back in, and we told you the same thing we told you before. Again. You screamed something about the guy from customer service - "He told me I am a 'valued customer'!" (Hint: He tells everyone that.) And back out the door you went, still with no refund to your liking.

You called customer service again. I'm sure by this time you thought you would have my job or something similar. Unfortunately for you, I had also been in contact with this nice man who overvalued you. I told him what I had offered you. To make my life easier, he also offered to send you a check to appease you, but you refused. No, you wanted to make sure you could torture every manager in my store one last time.

Except you never came.

And that makes me sad, because I so badly wanted to meet you for myself. Oh, and that guy who called you a "valued customer"? He also called you a "crazy lady" and authorized me to do anything to make you go away. Hope you're proud of yourself, since you've become nothing but an adult bully.

Note to Self: Maybe you should read this if you feel you are constantly receiving bad customer service wherever you go.


1 comment:

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